my name is Uther, and I’m on a quest
I’m ten leagues from Tintagel, headin’ due west
be there by midnight, if the stars all align
but what awaits me, I cannot divine
maybe I’ll find myself a fountain of youth
perhaps I’ll only steal a moment of truth
but either way, my destination’s the same
it’s in the arms of the Lady Igraine

with this dear Lady, I’ve become most obsessed
I seek a triste because my wrist needs a rest
out on the moors, fighting Saxons and Picts
don’t get around to meeting too many chicks
maybe the remedy for these Middle Age blues
is ridin’ bareback in another man’s shoes
hey, uniting England, that’s always been my campaign
it’s time I’m united with the Lady Igraine

I dreamed that she and I were lovers before
Fate brought us hither from a far distant shore
She made a promise at the circle of stones
with a circular motion of Her pelvic bones
by Merlin’s beard, our souls are two of a kind
but in this life, turns out Her body aint mine
tomorrow, she might take some Christian vow
where does that leave me now?

by Merlin’s beard, we’re twain, we’re two of a kind
I say, it just aint right that this woman’s not mine!
I know tomorrow she will go the Christian way
but she’s still pagan today…

My name is Uther and I’m on a quest
and, by the Goddess, my blade has been blessed
my lance is stiff, it’s holding the course
get in my way, I’ll knock you right off your horse
I just won’t stop until Justice is dealt
if I gotta bite my way through a chastity belt
in Cornwall’s bed the Red Dragon will reign
my head’ll be crowned by Lady Igraine

I’ve often wondered where the Summerland lies
looks like it’s just north of those lily-white thighs
confess tomorrow, should some guilt still remain
lay with me now and love me Igraine

©2008 Robert Reiser